Life in Kyiv, Ukraine

First Things Firs: Chapter 1-4

To live, to love, to learn and leave a legacy

1 How many people on their deathbed wish they’d spent more time at work ?
“The enemy of the best is good”
We are constantly making choices about the way we spend our time, and we are also leaving the consequences of this choices. 

2 The urgency addiction
Anything less than a conscious commitment to the important  is an unconscious commitment to the unimportant.
It’s become a status of our society – if we are busy, we are important ; if we are not busy we are almost embarrassed to admit it.

3 To live, to love, to learn and leave a legacy
Doing things faster is no substitute for doing the right things
What is “north” ? Is it a matter of opinion ? It is something we should vote on ? Is it subject to democratic process ? No, because “north” is a true reality independent of us.

4 Quadrant 2 organizing: The process of putting first things first
Where there are no gardener, there is no garden
We live our life in terms of goals – not in sense of role playing, but in the sense of authentic parts we’ve chosen to fill.

Goals

As book said "If you haven't done so, write your goals on your worksheet now" and at the same time I got goals assignment at my English class, here it is:

 

Fyodor Dostoeyevsky wrote "For the secret of man's being is not only to live but to have something to live for". And as anyone other I do have own many dreams, wishes, plans, desires, intentions.

As I am reading the book called "First things first" by Stephen Covey I have used his methodology to outline my true life goals. He says" We live our lives in terms of roles – not in the sense of role playing, but in sense of authentic parts we have chosen to fill" We may have important roles at work, in the family, in the community, or in other areas of life. Much of the pain in life comes from the sense that we are succeeding in one role at the expense of other. That is a trap to avoid.

Roles	Goals
Man	To love and to be loved To create a family To travel with loved woman all over the world
Work manager	To put my best effort into my team's success To create and implement new business ideas To improve constantly professional knowledge and skills
Free time manager	To find enough time for my hobbies To live healthy lifestyle
Son and brother	To help and support my parents and sister
Friend	To spend some time together with friends and often organize jointed social activities
Money manager	Make money work for me, instead of working for money
A citizen	To actively support politicians whom I trust
A socially responsible person	To support charity initiatives To promote healthy lifestyle To fight against global warming

 

Failure is a proof that desire was not strong enough

 

 

At our last meeting I heard this quotation and I thought “That sounds right. It must be one of universal rules”. I imagined smokers who wants to quite. The only thing they need to quit smoking is strong desire to do it. Nothing else.  I believe social environment and physical addiction are secondary.

Next I thought about an another case. What if I have a desire to become rich by winning a lottery ? My will could as strong as need for water in the desert Sahara. But, will I win even if I play all my life ? Not necessarily.  As simple as that pure luck is the component of success in some of our beginnings.

And, finally, third case. What if I decide to become to make a career of a singer. I might have desire to sing. By some lucky chance I will find a producer and come to the stage. But for the true success in my singer career I will certainly need a talent. A skill is what is equally important to desire and luck in any success path.

Therefore I realized that statement “failure is a proof that desire was not strong” is quite limited in its application. Sometimes your best is just not good enough. In the majority of the real life situations not only desire, but also luck and skill are major ingredients of success.